Saturday, July 18, 2009

Just Another Stinky Boy

Yup. That's my son. Just another stinky boy.
Let me back up just a little. We started the day with a refreshing bath and then headed out to the local farmers' market. We were greeted with sweltering temps that were in the low 100s. I was not anticipating that type of heat, and apparently neither were my fellow shoppers. We all were audibly complaining of the mind-numbing heat. It was enough to put you into a sweat-soaked coma. After our heat laden shopping excursion we came home for Luke's nap. Post nap we went to my in-laws to pick up the last of our frozen goods (the delivery man eventually arrived with our much-celebrated refrigerator.) Unfortunately most of the day was not spent lounging next to the air conditioning. When we got home I pulled my sweaty boy out of his car seat, and, wait, WHAT IS THAT FUNK? No. Really. What the hell stinks?! My sweet angel baby smells like sweaty gym socks?
Yes, I know babies sweat and sweat doesn't always smell good. But when it's your baby you just don't expect a funk to be oozing from his every pore. Babies are supposed to smell like lotion and sugary sweetness, not some old P.E. clothes that were shoved in the back of a teenagers locker for six months! i don't ever recall Maddie smelling this way. And trust me, there were plenty of summer days where she too was a bundle of slippery sweat.
Therefore I have come to the conclusion that it's because he is a boy. Not to offend the menfolk out there, but boys are stinky. Now, before any of the aforementioned boys gets their panties in a bunch let me state that, yes, for the record, girls can be stinky too. I will be the first to acknowledge that I do not smell like roses first thing in the morning. Shocking I know, but oh so true. As women, we generally smell good (or at least decent) 80-90% of the time. This is basically because we would be mortified if anyone referred to us as "stinky". It is just expected that we smell good. Just look at all of the yummy smelling products we use: deodorant, perfumes, lotions, bodysoaps, hairspray, blah, blah, blah.
Even our male dog smells a lot worse than our female dog. He is faaaaaaaaaaar more gaseous, and he too just has a FUNK. Can't quite put my finger on it, but there is always a stink about him.
Despite this, I LOVE my boys, stink and all. And on the next triple digit day I won't be quite so alarmed when my baby smells like boys locker room rather than a pink bottle of Johnson's and Johnson's.

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