Little Man Turns Two & It's a Circus!

The past few weeks have been crazy busy.  That kind of busy where you just fall into bed at the end of the day because you are so wiped out.  It all began with Lucas' second birthday.  2!!!!  I can't believe two years have flown by so quickly!  Really, how does it happen so fast?  At two he is ca-ray-zy busy.  Fascinated by outlets and anything with buttons, a climber of shelves, stools, tables, and chairs, a lover of being "ow-side" (outside), obsessed with Barney and coloring, and lightning-fast (especially when he A.  has something he shouldn't or B.  was just caught doing something naughty.)  Despite all of his shenanigans he is quite the little charmer.  Everywhere we go people make a fuss, especially the women.  Lucas just turns on the dimples and eats it up.  Since he was a year old he has had a thing for blondes (traitor!).  Already discriminating hair color at such a tender age!  Although he has his dad's dimples and flirtatiousness, he has his mom's attitude.  During a phone conversation I was lamenting to mom how Lucas can be whiny when he wants something or things are not going his way, and how it is a down right temper tantrum (with kicking and screaming) when he can't have his way.  To which my mom replied, "You were the same way."  Now I am sure she was smiling on the other end of the phone thinking, "Payback's a bitch isn't it?!" 
We celebrated this wonderful occasion with a circus themed party.  The decorating possibilities were endless!  Between the running, playing with friends, cake eating, and gift opening Lucas was exhausted.  But the most important thing was that  he had a blast.  The candy buffet was a hit with the kids.  Shocking I know!  I had a lot of fun with the candy buffet and tried really hard not to go overboard.  The last thing I wanted was to be stuck with enough candy to feed an army.  I also created a photo booth and provided a bunch of props.  It was quite entertaining to see what people came up with for the photos!


Here is the invitation I created in Illustrator.  Wanted to use all of the skills I have learned in my classes!  I put the invites in vintage popcorn bags.

  

Centerpieces:  Mason jars (from our wedding!), filled with flowers and placed in popcorn boxes with raffle tickets.  The tablecloths are also a wedding relic :).



She is just hilarious!



I found these great cake toppers on Etsy and created my own.  Here is the link to the Etsy version

It's amazing what a little frosting in the hair will do!

Soooo tired!

Musical Menagerie

Michael's sells these great instruments.  They are not too pricey, especially when you add one of their 40% off coupons.  Santa brought Lucas several for Christmas and he loves them.  I realize the thought of a two year old and instruments is a rather frightening concept when it comes to preserving your sanity hearing, but they are not too bad.  It has become a fun family activity that we all get into.  Do we we all look like complete dorks?  Yup, but it is so worth it!  Lukey's face lights up as he bounces to the beat and sings his own little made-up ditty.  And to watch both kids make "music" together is so sweet it makes my heart ache.

Where Does She Come Up With These Things?

As I am driving Maddie to her dad's tonight we passed one of the larger Christmas tree farms in town.  She took one look at the trees all neatly lined up and exclaimed, "Wow!  They got the hook up!"

Apparently my eight year old has a new catch phrase...  These things just tickle me :)

Boys Should Come With a Warning Label

Seriously. One big, fat, ha-uge warning label. This label is really needed when the only experience you've previously had was a mild-mannered little girl who was content to sit quietly, and play with toys for hours on end.

Imagine my surprise every time my darling son gets himself into a "predicament." We've learned a lot in the past 19 months, but he continues to surprise us. Most recently was last week when he got his arm stuck, STUCK!!!, in between the slats on my dining room chair. Not sure what happened when he tried to climb it, but there the arm was. For the record, said chair was pushed in so he could not climb it. Joke's on me I guess. I could not get his arm to slide past his chubby little elbow. He was screaming, I was panicking, and Todd was sleeping after a night working the graveyard shift. Crap!! Double crap!!! What do I do?!?! Soap! I need something slippery! Todd! He needs to wake up and help me! Do I call the fire department? Are we going to have to saw the chair? But what about his arm? What if they accidentally saw his arm! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! Oh it gets better, his arm was stuck in such an angle that I could not put him down, I had to hold him so he wouldn't break it. Here I was, holding a screaming baby, we were both in the throes of utter panic as I tried to carry him and the solid oak chair through the living room, over the baby gate, to my bedroom. Halfway there I put Luke and chair down to get a better grip. Somehow that put him at the perfect angle where his arm could slide right out. SIGH! He was fine, I was shaking and in need of a drink just to calm my frayed nerves. Unfortunately it was only 10AM.

Here are some other glimpses into the toddler boy mind that nobody warns you about:

*Outlets are fun and can be mastered by the time you are 10 months old.

*If you want to watch your mom break a sweat climb onto the computer chair and bang away on the keyboard. When she puts you on the floor to fix the computer take off running out the screen door into the backyard. Make sure to squeal gleefully the entire time!

*Chairs and sofas are for climbing and jumping, not sitting.

*Anything that can support your weight provides great leverage for reaching the TV. Just put your makeshift stool in front of the TV, step up and the buttons are there for the taking. Very entertaining to watch Mom and Dad freak out if you happen to own a flat screen. Gosh, they act like I'm going to ruin the screen or something!

*When Mommy or Daddy serve you a food you don't like, or when you are done eating throw it on the floor or the wall. The dogs loooove it!

*If you can sneak into the kitchen pull out all the cookie cutters and watch Mommy hop around on one foot after she steps on one. While she is hopping around proceed to pull out as many sandwich bags as you can. Then as she stuffs them back into the box pull out some tupperware and go splash in the dog's water.

*If after all these shenanigans your Mommy still has some semblance of her sanity left poop in the tub, works like a charm every time! Please note, it is best to wait until after she has dumped in all of your bath toys.

The Great Poop Caper

Scene of the Crime: Kids’ bathroom, in the bath tub
Date of the Crime: Tuesday, March 30 at 6:30pm
Perpetrator: Luke
Victim: Mom and the bath tub

I am sure lots of parents have been subjected to this crime. But Tuesday was my first. I made it seven and a half years without falling prey to the” bath tub poopie” (BTP for short.) Luke was happily splashing around in the tub, content to give the surrounding areas with a good soaking. I was settled down on the floor in the no-splash zone mindlessly flipping through a magazine when I heard it. The pre-emptive poop groan. The one that tells you your sweet little angel is about to present you with a big, odorous gift. In one swift move I threw the magazine aside, leapt to my feet and yanked him out of the bath. Too late. There it was: the BTP! UGH!!! GROSS!!! Of coarse these types of situations only occur when Todd is not home. I am never blessed with reinforcements.
Damage control began. I swear, Moms should be in charge of FEMA. We can swiftly assess the damage, then create, prioritize, and execute a plan of action. Dry off baby, begin draining tub, stop baby from throwing more toys into tub of fecal water, pull bath seat out of tub, dispose of offending poopie, grab Chlorox wipes, grab all toys and dump into sink, wash hands vigorously with TONS of soap, wrestle naked baby back into the bathroom after gleefully running away, de-cootie-fy tub and toys with Chlorox wipes, remove plunger from baby’s firm grasp just before he puts the handle in his mouth, pray that I don’t lose sanity, rinse tub, re-fill tub with clean bathwater, put baby in tub, fantasize about how great a glass of wine would be right about now, call husband to bitch about BTP, pray this never happens again.

Maddie's Story

Yesterday while I was floating around the blogoshpere I popped onto Design Mom for a bit. For the duration of her pregnancy she has been posting readers' birthing stories. You can find them all here. I thought, "what the hell, I'll submit Maddie's birthing story." For those of you who don't know, my Maddie was not a planned pregnancy. I'm very open about it and despite the opinions of others, I feel there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Although she was a surprise (to say the least!), she was and is loved and cherished beyond measure. So here is my story:

My pregnancy happened by surprise. I was twenty-five, dating my boyfriend for a little over a year, and getting ready to finish my BA. The last thing I planned on was getting pregnant. But two little lines on a pregnancy test abruptly changed my life FOREVER. When I saw the results my heart sank, and I uttered “Oh my God…” All these thoughts came rushing at once: What do I do? My life is OVER! How do we tell our parents? We are not financially prepared for this! And then there was a thought. The thought. I could get an abortion. And yet, despite my liberal views I knew I couldn't’t do it. I knew abortion would be something I would regret my entire life. And I am so glad I chose her. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful for my daughter.
Unfortunately in the last four weeks of my pregnancy I was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia. My doctor prescribed total bedrest and a scheduled induction at thirty-nine weeks. At that point I was so swollen, tired, and uncomfortable bed rest seemed like a three week spa vacation!
The night before my delivery her father and I could hardly sleep. All I could think was, “Tomorrow you will meet your baby! Tomorrow you are going to have an actual human come out of your body! Holy crap! Come. out. of. my. body. ACK!”
At 6AM, November 11th, 2002 I was induced. Some parts were good (hearing the gallop of her heart beat.) Some parts were not so good (the attempts to place a catheter between her head and my uterus before I got my epidural. YOWZA!) But then I got the news from my doctor, my baby was showing signs of distress. They would have to attempt the fetal catheter again to monitor her heart rate more closely. And just as they inserted the catheter it happened. Her heart rate dropped, and continued to drop. That heart beat that I found so soothing before was now bringing me to tears. It was so slow. That gallop had turned into trot. Alarms were buzzing, people rushing into my room, my doctor yanking wires out of monitors to transfer me into the operating room for an emergency c-section, and all I could do was sob and think, “I have come too far to lose my baby!” Her father stood there in shock as a nurse shoved a smock into his hands so he could join me in the OR. My mom, a nurse, tried to soothe me words of encouragement. My dad just burst into tears.
My doctor, God bless her, stayed calm through the entire ordeal. And after what seemed like forever my new daughter was pulled out from my stomach at 1:40PM. All I could think was, “Please let me hear her scream. Please let me hear her scream. If she screams it means she’s breathing.” And scream she did! The baby that was so distressed scored a ten on her APGAR. She was healthy; she was perfect. And she was a blessing. She may not have been planned, but my little Madeleine Kay was one of the best “things” to ever happen to me. For that I am thankful. Thankful for her and thankful I didn’t make a different choice.

To summarize the ending, her father and I split two years later. We weren't right for each other. Todd and I reunited a while later (we dated in high school. Makes for a great story when people ask how we met!.) Five years, one wedding, another baby, and two dogs later here we are. Maddie's father has also remarried. They are expecting their baby this fall. He and I share 50/50 custody. For me, I am blessed that Maddie was so young when Todd and I started dating. When it came time to introduce and integrate her into our relationship we took it slooooow. But all of her memories include him. In her eyes, Toddy has always been there. I love that. There was no awkward adjustment, no fears of losing Mama to a new man. We were fortunate.

I am open with this story because I want to show people unplanned pregnancies can and do have happy endings. With my pregnancy came unimaginable responsibility, but it also came with a love and a passion for another human being that I never knew existed.

And for the record, I am still a die-hard pro-choice advocate. Just because I didn't choose abortion doesn't mean I don't approve of a woman's right to choose. I feel fortunate that I had that choice available to me. It is not only a personal decision, it is also a choice based on timing and life circumstances. I had a job, I had medical insurance, I had the support of both of our families and our friends. Not everyone is so fortunate. My choice would have been dramatically different had I been an eighteen year old, unemployed college student.

Thanks for letting me share my story and my thoughts!

Making the Cut

Lukey got his first haircut a couple of weeks ago. The kid was blessed with a great head of hair when he was born. Everyone tsk, tsked it would fall out, but that never happened. All he had was a bald patch from rubbing his head on the carseat. No infant balding for this kid. And then it grew. And. Grew. I knew it was getting long. As I poured water over his head in the bath it would cascade to his shoulders. Hmmm… maybe it’s time I thought. I certainly never wanted him to look Celine Dion’s kid! But then I would procrastinate. After all, he is just a baby. Until one day when Todd and I were shopping at Michael's. Lucas was in his stroller, looking all dapper wearing his “Little Brother” shirt. Todd waited (and silently cursed himself for coming along) while I meandered. Women approached him because who can resist a dad and his smiling baby? He beamed with pride until they told him “what a cute little girl” he had. The I got the look. The look that says, “Dude!!! Give the kid a haircut and call it a day! No one calls my SON a girl!”
Auntie Courtney did the honors. She is a hairdresser and a mom. Therefore she knows how to be fast and patient, yet able to cut in a straight line. To have Auntie Court do the first haircut made it a lot more meaningful as well. It is always fun to share these moments with someone special.
Lucas was a great “client”. He sat patiently in his booster seat and noshed on his puffs. No tears, no hysterics. It was so fun to watch. My little man getting his first big boy haircut. The little ham even posed for the “after” photo!

Can those bangs be any longer?!

The finished product:

Catching Up

Wow! Two months have already passed since my last post. Damn, time really flies. Life has been a whirlwind since school began for both Maddie and me. First grade suits her well. We just had our first parent-teacher conference a week ago. She is meeting all of her benchmarks and has lots of friends. She is a bit of a dreamer though. Unfortunately this leads to several bits of unfinished work that can easily pile up. I get it though. It’s the artist in her. I have been known to be the same way. Only difference is she is soooo MUCH worse. But Mrs. Maher told us Maddie is very empathetic to the feelings of others, very kind, and is considerate. Honestly, I would rather she excel in empathy and be somewhat of a daydreaming lollygagger. You can’t teach empathy like you can the Three R’s. This is not to say we aren’t holding her accountable for her unfinished work. I requested the teacher add some of it added on to her homework. Maddie is not a fan of this solution, but then again that’s the point. Despite the lollygagging and daydreaming I am very proud of my sweet little girl. I love that she thinks of others. I can’t say you always find that quality in people these days….
A lot has happened since my last post. Luke has grown TONS! He is cruising everywhere. Nothing is sacred in our home these days. If it is within his reach it is fair game in his eyes. OY! Like his older sister, Luke is quite the social butterfly. He will readily flash those dimples to anyone who gives him an ounce of attention. He finally got his first haircut a week ago. It was getting ridiculously long (just ask Papa!) and everyone thought he was a girl (even when he wore his “Little Brother” shirt.) Now he looks like such a big boy. Luke is too smart for his own good. He seems to figure EVERYTHING out. He will watch you do something once and then he seems to pick it up. Keeps me on my toes that’s for sure!
Madeleine turned seven this month. SEVEN! Where does the time go?! She is such a good-natured little girl (most of the time…) often offering to share with her family. She is an amazing big sister. It still surprises how well she has adjusted to having a little brother. I think she loves having a real-live baby that she can pick up and tote around (no matter how much me protests.) Thursdays she looks forward to having dinner at Nana and Papa’s after Mom gets out of class. And the weekends bring overwhelming joy when she gets to spend the night at Grandma and Grandpa’s house.
I am taking two classes this semester because I am a glutton for punishment. It’s not like I didn’t already have my hands full in SAHM-dom. And my sanity? Do I really need to keep it? Although stressful it keeps my mind fresh. I think without it I might get a little mentally mushy. So I am taking courses to finish my BA and photography/visual communications courses. Sort of nice to get some “me” time.
Todd is busy working and helping me not go crazy. He is such a good dad/bonus-dad. He really steps up to the plate and does what it takes to give our children a good family oriented foundation. He and I manage to get some dates in here and there. Although we enjoy the rugrats it is great to spend time as a couple. Plus we love getting out and visiting friends. As a result, his days off are a complete whirlwind for us. Cleaning the house, visiting with friends and family, taking the kids places.
As you can see, I am finally settling into my role as a SAHM. Waking up to my son’s poopy mess has now become the norm for me. I still have not made it glamorous or easy (if anything I less glam now. ACK!) But I still keep trying and the adventures still keep coming my way.

Maddie-kins

Little Fish in Swimming Lessons

First Wednesday Street Fair After a Rare June Rain

Photoshoot in Tahoe

Enjoying Soft Serve at the County Fair

Puppy Love

I can't begin to express how much I love you Maddie-kins. You were my first. All of my Mommy adventures began with you. Thanks for teaching me how precious the title, Mama is.

Milestones

Unless you have worked in special education or the medical field developmental milestones in a baby/toddler may not be a tremendous concern. A thought it the back of your mind? Definitely. But something you think about everyday? Maybe not. With Maddie I didn't read too much into them. Her dad, who works in the medical field? Totally different story. Always looking for milestone achievement.

Several years later when I got a job in special education I began to realize how vital these milestones were. Consequently I have turned into one of those nutjobs who is aways on the lookout for milestone achievement. Omigod?! Did he coo at two months?! Did he sit up at four months?! Is he social and responding to my voice?! Suffice to say, they have become a mini-source of anxiety for me at Luke's well-baby check ups. The nurse and doctor ask me the usual barrage of questions and I answer with bated breath, eagerly waiting for his progress report. Is he development on track? Are we meeting, exceeding, or behind in development. Tell me! TELL ME!!!! HOW IS MY CHILD?!?! Clearly Todd is the calm, level-headed person in this relationship (ie. the normal one.)

At his six month check up we were told Luke is doing great and meeting all of his milestones. Apparently all the dog hair he had ingested during the first six months of life had not been to his detriment. PHEW!

Honestly though, I am so grateful his development is on track. It is a tremendous blessing to have a wee one that is thriving.

So this is where Luke is right now with his development: he is crawling, has begun to pull himself up, has started to throw little temper tantrums when he can't have what he wants (I swear between these three things alone my last shred of sanity is coming to a screeching halt), he says "da da", "ma ma", "ba", & "la", he is obsessed with the remote control (clearly he is his father's son!), is curious about EVERYTHING (the best way to explore anything is to put it in his mouth, his favorites items being being flip flops and electrical cords), and he love love loves to flirt (yup, totally his father's son.) Right now he is infatuated with his sister (who dotes on him constantly unless something better is on TV), the dogs (patient despite all the hair pulling and climbing, I guess this makes up for them being assholes the other 80% of the time), and the outdoors (can't get enough of the trees. Yay! Mama's got herself a little green tree hugger :)!!) He is finally beginning to nap. He was not too fond of them the first four to five months. I got the newborn that would stay awake for four to six hours, take a ten minute catnap, and then wake up (it was rough!) Now the dishes can actually be washed or I can waste a lot of time on the computer.

I cannot believe time has passed us by so quickly. It feels like yesterday he was my beefy 9 pound newborn wanting to be held constantly. Now I have a six month old who would rather crawl and put germ-laden shoes in his mouth rather than be confined in my arms.

Golden Shower and a Caffeine Delay

Not the way I really wanted to begin my day. But it is what it is. For the record, despite having kids I am one of those people that needs to ease into my morning. Ease into it verrrrrrry slooooooooowllllllly. Thank the good lord above I married someone who has the same morning needs. This is key for a successful marriage. Trust me, I have tried it with a morning person. UGH! The happiness! The AM joy! It took all of my strength not tell him to go fuck himself. Anyway, I digress. Where was I? Right. This morning. First I wake up to very poopy diaper. Which I proceeded to migrate onto my hands when I tried to clean it up. Now, I may not have gagged like other people (TODD!), but really, the thought of fecal matter on my hands first thing in the morning does not appeal to me. Call me crazy, but it just doesn't. After I finished wiping the aforementioned poo from my son's butt the diaper came unfurled. Now, as you all know, when a "Number 2" diaper (filled with "Number 2" wipes!) becomes unrolled it is no easy feat to re-roll it into the neat little hockey puck you began with. Especially with shit on your hands. Combine this with me: have not had so much as a drop of coffee and mentally functioning at a pre-school level. Therefore I gave up and just dumped the entire mess into the garbage can (no, not an inside garbage can. All Number 2's go into the garage. We are old skool here people. No Diaper Genie. Such rebels we are!)

Since my hands were tainted I just laid the unfolded diaper over Luke's necessary parts while I disposed of the hazardous waste. I can hear the collective sigh from all of the "boy-moms" out there. They know where this is going and at this point are probably wondering if I have not learned the boys-and-their-parts-being-exposed-to-fresh-air lesson. Yes, I did learn that lesson. Many times in fact. That is why I tried to cover the parts. It was only for a moment! Really! I just needed to throw out the diaper and wash the poo off of my hands. Unfortunately I am not talented enough to hold my poo hand in the air as I pin my son down and deftly change his diaper with one hand. I missed that class on parenting.

Just as I returned Luke pulled the diaper off, felt the cool morning air upon his goods, and doused himself, the Boppy, and the porta-crib in a golden shower. Since he was on his back he sprayed directly at his face. Poor kid had to squeeze his eyes shut and turn his head to avoid hitting himself in the eye. Might as well start setting aside money for the therapy that looms in his future. I can see it now:

Over Priced Therapist: "Can you tell me where your anger towards women and relationships stems from?"

Traumatized Luke: "Why yes. My mother missed the class on one-handed-diaper-changing and consequently almost blinded me with my own urine. It has all been down hill since then, Doc."

At this point I assessed the damage and, to be honest, it didn't look too bad. I began to think, "maybe I can clean this off with a wipe and wait until after I finish my coffee to give him a bath." But as gave his backside a once over (and contemplated the over-priced therapist's reaction to that little nugget of a childhood memory) I realized a bath was imminent. Although the front looked good, the pee had apparently shot over his head and ran down his back. Both head and shirt were soaked.

Let's review the first three minutes of my morning:

* I put my hands in shit

*My son showered himself in piss

*In addition to college I now have to start saving for my son's overpriced therapist because he almost blinded himself and it WAS ALL MY FAULT!

*My mental capacity is somewhere at a three year old level since I STILL HAVE NOT HAD ANY CAFFEINE!

*I now have to give Luke a bath because he is covered in his own bodily fluids.

All I have to say is thank God pee is sterile!